Damn, everything just isn't going according to plan. I'm kind of unhappy with it definitely. But things just happen, thing that are not within control. So are we going to let it stay that way? Why not accept the things that happen to us, and embrace the opportunities present?
I find myself at fault too. But when everything goes wrong, we can't blame anyone but ourselves. If not, then who? Luck?
There are things that I try very hard for, because I want to cherish them. Sometimes I hold back, but the questions keep tugging and bombarding back at me. The more we do, the more failures we have. I'm not going to give up on anything.
I'm just going to stand by my own principles and do what I can. Embrace and maybe we can find more purpose in life.
'50 Things' from Ben Jones, MIT Admissions Blog
Just something I came across in my friend's facebook wall post. 50 Things that we should take note of when we enter MIT. I'm not entering MIT, but I think all these we can apply in our life no matter in school or outside school. Just to share (:
Can't wait to go back to school, and to ORD of course :D
8 Nov, HERE I COME~
"50 Things"
Dear Class of 2010,
This will be my last entry written specifically for you; beginning with the launch of our new site in early September, I'll begin focusing on the future class of 2011. I hope that you guys won't be strangers; stay in touch either in person (come visit us!) or online (please drop by the blogs from time to time and say hi).
As you begin your college experience, and I prepare for my 10-year college reunion, I thought I'd leave you with the things that, in retrospect, I think are important as you navigate the next four years. I hope that some of them are helpful.
Here goes...
Be yourself. Create. Inspire, and be inspired. Grow. Laugh. Learn. Love.
- Your friends will change a lot over the next four years. Let them.
- Call someone you love back home a few times a week, even if just for a few minutes.
- In college more than ever before, songs will attach themselves to memories. Every month or two, make a mix cd, mp3 folder, whatever - just make sure you keep copies of these songs. Ten years out, they'll be as effective as a journal in taking you back to your favorite moments.
- Take naps in the middle of the afternoon with reckless abandon.
- Adjust your schedule around when you are most productive and creative. If you're nocturnal and do your best work late at night, embrace that. It may be the only time in your life when you can.
- If you write your best papers the night before they are due, don't let people tell you that you "should be more organized" or that you "should plan better." Different things work for different people. Personally, I worked best under pressure - so I always procrastinated... and always kicked ass (which annoyed my friends to no end). ;-) Use the freedom that comes with not having grades first semester to experiment and see what works best for you.
- At least a few times in your college career, do something fun and irresponsible when you should be studying. The night before my freshman year psych final, my roommate somehow scored front row seats to the Indigo Girls at a venue 2 hours away. I didn't do so well on the final, but I haven't thought about psych since 1993. I've thought about the experience of going to that show (with the guy who is now my son's godfather) at least once a month ever since.
- Become friends with your favorite professors. Recognize that they can learn from you too - in fact, that's part of the reason they chose to be professors.
- Carve out an hour every single day to be alone. (Sleeping doesn't count.)
- Go on dates. Don't feel like every date has to turn into a relationship.
- Don't date someone your roommate has been in a relationship with.
- When your friends' parents visit, include them. You'll get free food, etc., and you'll help them to feel like they're cool, hangin' with the hip college kids.
- In the first month of college, send a hand-written letter to someone who made college possible for you and describe your adventures thus far. It will mean a lot to him/her now, and it will mean a lot to you in ten years when he/she shows it to you.
- Embrace the differences between you and your classmates. Always be asking yourself, "what can I learn from this person?" More of your education will come from this than from any classroom.
- All-nighters are entirely overrated.
- For those of you who have come to college in a long-distance relationship with someone from high school: despite what many will tell you, it can work. The key is to not let your relationship interfere with your college experience. If you don't want to date anyone else, that's totally fine! What's not fine, however, is missing out on a lot of defining experiences because you're on the phone with your boyfriend/girlfriend for three hours every day.
- Working things out between friends is best done in person, not over email. (IM does not count as "in person.") Often someone's facial expressions will tell you more than his/her words.
- Take risks.
- Don't be afraid of (or excited by) the co-ed bathrooms. The thrill is over in about 2 seconds.
- Wednesday is the middle of the week; therefore on wednesday night the week is more than half over. You should celebrate accordingly. (It makes thursday and friday a lot more fun.)
- Welcome failure into your lives. It's how we grow. What matters is not that you failed, but that you recovered.
- Take some classes that have nothing to do with your major(s), purely for the fun of it.
- It's important to think about the future, but it's more important to be present in the now. You won't get the most out of college if you think of it as a stepping stone.
- When you're living on a college campus with 400 things going on every second of every day, watching TV is pretty much a waste of your time and a waste of your parents' money. If you're going to watch, watch with friends so at least you can call it a "valuable social experience."
- Don't be afraid to fall in love. When it happens, don't take it for granted. Celebrate it, but don't let it define your college experience.
- Much of the time you once had for pleasure reading is going to disappear. Keep a list of the books you would have read had you had the time, so that you can start reading them when you graduate.
- Things that seem like the end of the world really do become funny with a little time and distance. Knowing this, forget the embarassment and skip to the good part.
- Every once in awhile, there will come an especially powerful moment when you can actually feel that an experience has changed who you are. Embrace these, even if they are painful.
- No matter what your political or religious beliefs, be open-minded. You're going to be challenged over the next four years in ways you can't imagine, across all fronts. You can't learn if you're closed off.
- If you need to get a job, find something that you actually enjoy. Just because it's work doesn't mean it has to suck.
- Don't always lead. It's good to follow sometimes.
- Take a lot of pictures. One of my major regrets in life is that I didn't take more pictures in college. My excuse was the cost of film and processing. Digital cameras are cheap and you have plenty of hard drive space, so you have no excuse.
- Your health and safety are more important than anything.
- Ask for help. Often.
- Half of you will be in the bottom half of your class at any given moment. Way more than half of you will be in the bottom half of your class at some point in the next four years. Get used to it.
- In ten years very few of you will look as good as you do right now, so secretly revel in how hot you are before it's too late.
- In the long run, where you go to college doesn't matter as much as what you do with the opportunities you're given there. The MIT name on your resume won't mean much if that's the only thing on your resume. As a student here, you will have access to a variety of unique opportunities that no one else will ever have - don't waste them.
- On the flip side, don't try to do everything. Balance = well-being.
- Make perspective a priority. If you're too close to something to have good perspective, rely on your friends to help you.
- Eat badly sometimes. It's the last time in your life when you can do this without feeling guilty about it.
- Make a complete ass of yourself at least once, preferably more. It builds character.
- Wash your sheets more than once a year. Trust me on this one.
- If you are in a relationship and none of your friends want to hang out with you and your significant other, pay attention. They usually know better than you do.
- Don't be afraid of the weird pizza topping combinations that your new friend from across the country loves. Some of the truly awful ones actually taste pretty good. Expand your horizons.
- Explore the campus thoroughly. Don't get caught.
- Life is too short to stick with a course of study that you're no longer excited about. Switch, even if it complicates things.
- Tattoos are permanent. Be very certain.
- Don't make fun of prefrosh. That was you like 2 hours ago.
- Enjoy every second of the next four years. It is impossible to describe how quickly they pass.
- This is the only time in your lives when your only real responsibility is to learn. Try to remember how lucky you are every day.
Welcome to some of the best years of your lives.
-B
Can't wait to go back to school, and to ORD of course :D
8 Nov, HERE I COME~
Blink!
Finally, I have gotten hold of one of Malcolm Gladwell's book. And it's one of the titles that caught my eye when it was first in stock in the bookstore.
Having a great time reading and savouring it. His points about thin slicing, the first impressions we have are quite intriguing. I think all of us definitely have experiences that are similar to those written in the book. Haven't completed the book yet, but I think this book will get me reading over and over again..
Having a great time reading and savouring it. His points about thin slicing, the first impressions we have are quite intriguing. I think all of us definitely have experiences that are similar to those written in the book. Haven't completed the book yet, but I think this book will get me reading over and over again..
The Script - For The First Time
She's all laid up in bed with a broken heart,
While I'm drinking Jack all alone in my local bar.
And we don't know how
How we got into this mad situation,
Only doing things out of frustration,
Tryna make it work,
But man these times are hard.
She needs me now but I cant seem to find the time.
I got a new job now on the unemployment line.
And we don't know how
How we got into this mess. Is it God's test?
Someone help us 'cause where doing our best.
Tryna make it work,
But man these times are hard.
But we're gonna start by drinking old cheap bottles of wine,
Sit talking up all night,
Saying things we havent for a while,
A while, yeah.
We're smiling but we're close to tears,
Even after all these years.
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting
For the first time.
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooooo (Ooo ooo)
She's in line at the door with her head held high,
Well I just lost my job, but didn't lose my pride,
And we both know how
How we're gonna make it work when it hurts,
When you pick yourself up you get kicked to the dirt.
Tryna make it work,
But man these times are hard.
But we're gonna start by drinking old cheap bottles of wine,
Sit talking up all night,
Doing things we haven't for a while,
A while, yeah.
We're smiling but we're close to tears,
Even after all these years.
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting
For the first time.
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooooo (Ooo ooo)
Yeah, drinking old cheap bottles of wine,
Sit talking up all night,
Saying things we haven't for a while.
We're smiling but we're close to tears,
Even after all these years.
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting
For the first time.
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
(Yeah, for the first time)
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
(Oh, for the first time)
Ooo ooo ooo ooo, ooo ooo, ooo ooo
(Yeah, For the first time)
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting
For the first time.
Oh these times are hard.
Yeah they're making us crazy.
Don't give up on me baby.
Oh these times are hard.
Yeah they're making us crazy.
Don't give up on me baby.
Oh these times are hard.
Yeah they're making us crazy.
Don't give up on me baby.
Oh these times are hard.
Yeah they're making us crazy.
Don't give up on me baby.
Knowledge is Power
After today's SUTD's 'Masters of Technology and Design' lecture, I realised that I really really missed school! I want to go back to studying so much. I just got to wait 2 more months till I ORD. Yes, just 2 more months to freedom!
Today's lecture was enriching because it somewhat introduced me to what architecture can be. And indeed, it showed me the beautiful aspects of buildings. The speaker was Professor Fumihiko Maki, a renowned architect who won the prestigious Pritzker Prize. Although he is at old age of 82, I was impressed by hisinsight during the lecture in which he introduced his thoughts and ideas while designing the various academic institutions.
Few points that I could take away:
- 'A city is a big house, and house is a small city"
The intricate designs in a house and a city are somewhat similar in that city. I think whatever is needed in the house applies the same to a city, just that the city is more expansive in size and holds a larger population.
- Between 0 to 16metres of a building will determine the character of the building because most interaction between human beings occur in that range
The usage of space is evident in Prof Maki's work. The way he used the horizontal, vertical and diagonal lines to contrast and allow people/residents to desire to work in the space available to them was very impressive. One example is Singapore's own Republic Polytechnic. Students make use of the space to occupy themselves with activities. These activities are what determine the character of a buidling or how successful architecture has excited education in the institute.
I really admire Professor Maki for being so strong in his heart for architecture. Even though he is 82 this year, he still contributes so much to the architectural world. Even now, he is involved in the rebuilding of Ground Zero - World Trade Center Tower 4. People like him can really devote themselves to their work and interest. I hope I can be like this, contributing to the world, leaving behind my footprints in others' memories. Likewise, I am going to remember the lecture that I had today.
I am really excited about the SUTD education. I can't wait to start, actually. After hearing what Prof Tom and Mr Ng have explained about how SUTD's education is going to produce the next future generation of students that will be different from the rest, I can't help but feel upbeat about what I will go through in SUTD. It is the only university that has really captured my attention, and the only one that really makes me want to enroll in it.
I just can't wait to go back to school again, to the environment where learning and interaction is so fun. I guess NS will help me cherish university education and impel me to do my best.
Complicated
Why is life so complicated? Before when we were younger, like during primary school days, our lives were so much simpler. There was nothing much to worry about and for what we did, the adults didn't really care.
But now, we complicate ourselves with matters that can seem simple on the outside but messy in the inside. Why do we have to complicate things when it can be so much simpler? Do we have to think so much about it? Are we all influenced to ask ourselves so many questions, which consequently cause ourselves to be paranoid and afraid to put one step forward.
Action still speaks louder than words. There are a few who can act rationally without thinking too much. These are the people who can think on the ground, cut the crap off the whole load of content, and just go straight to the point. And it is also the fact that they are able to do this, that they have this natural aura of leadership.
There is just too much baggage that we have to carry around in our lives. All our personal experiences whether happy or sad, can help us in growing up but we have to move on. By moving on, we should leave these history behind, but not totally. It has to be enough to start afresh and to tell yourself that it will not affect your future decisions.
I was told that there only exists a thin line for something. I am someone who seeks answers fervently, bashing through anything that comes into my way till I reach my destination. Having a thin line may mean that others can easily transcend into the boundaries. Thin or not, the line has to be absolute. Both parties will need to understand the absolute statuses and rights conferred on the side beyond the line. A thin line doesn't give answers. It merely gives space for doubts and misunderstandings to grow.
Was it something I said, or just my personality?
But now, we complicate ourselves with matters that can seem simple on the outside but messy in the inside. Why do we have to complicate things when it can be so much simpler? Do we have to think so much about it? Are we all influenced to ask ourselves so many questions, which consequently cause ourselves to be paranoid and afraid to put one step forward.
Action still speaks louder than words. There are a few who can act rationally without thinking too much. These are the people who can think on the ground, cut the crap off the whole load of content, and just go straight to the point. And it is also the fact that they are able to do this, that they have this natural aura of leadership.
There is just too much baggage that we have to carry around in our lives. All our personal experiences whether happy or sad, can help us in growing up but we have to move on. By moving on, we should leave these history behind, but not totally. It has to be enough to start afresh and to tell yourself that it will not affect your future decisions.
I was told that there only exists a thin line for something. I am someone who seeks answers fervently, bashing through anything that comes into my way till I reach my destination. Having a thin line may mean that others can easily transcend into the boundaries. Thin or not, the line has to be absolute. Both parties will need to understand the absolute statuses and rights conferred on the side beyond the line. A thin line doesn't give answers. It merely gives space for doubts and misunderstandings to grow.
Was it something I said, or just my personality?
When I'm With You
Saw you walk in to the room
Thought i'd try to talk to you
Babe am i every glad you wanted me too
Its been two years to the day
half the time I've been away
i know I'm not there enough
but that is gonna change
cause I'm coming back
to show you that
I'm keeping the promise that i made
When i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
I'll make every second count
when I'm with you
yeah we've had our ups and downs
but we've always worked them out
babe am i ever glad we got this far now
still i'm lying here tonight
wishing i was by your side
cause when i'm not there enough
nothing feels right
so i'm coming back to show you that I'll love you the rest of my life
when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
i'll make every second count
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
whatever it takes
im not gonna break the promise i made
when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you
when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
i'll make every second count
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
I Got Owned by a T-Rex
It's 10.10pm and I feel so tired right now... I think it was because I only slept like 4 hours before waking up at 6 this morning. Had to go to camp myself because mum was going to have her op today. Couldn't take leave or off, because the date for the surgery came too suddenly.
And in camp, it was a normal day at work except for the fact that I was with the T-rex alone as the rest went to do their YOG stuff. I wasn't needed because I was special (as what Joshua had mentioned because I am untouchable). Haha, but the worst thing was when I got owned by the T-rex after the rest came back. It went like this:
Me talking to Nigel: Nigel, I think you do a better job than T-Rex, why not you switch vocation with him?
T-Rex comes from the back: What!?
Me: Oh, I was saying that Nigel is better than you, and he should replace you as the storeman.
T-Rex: Huh ok lor. If like that, then never mind. I can be your understudy! :D Do clerk job with you. Everyday can free fuck (and he does the hands in the air, hips rocking away motion)
So I got stunned by his words as he went crazy after saying those. Joshua, Christopher and T-Rex were high-fiving as it got super funny for them. And the next thing was:
T-Rex: You know now hungry ghost festival right? I am a ghost, so I can see you changing, bathing and ...
I got stunned again -.- Wah lao, the guys got even louder because it was so crazy. I laughed along with them, but then got quite disgusted with T-Rex. Seriously man, he should stop being so gay. I don't even know if he is straight or not. I hope he is -.- He even asked me to go drinking with him once I ORD. Who will wanna do that!? Definitely not me!
Yea, so this incident just kept all the guys chattering away today, leaving me in the spotlight. Yea, it was quite funny, but I just hope that T-Rex can stop all his 'gay roaring'. It just gives the other guys a wrong idea ar. What if my boss finds out and misunderstands? I can imagine him calling, "Sebastian! Can you come to my office? I got something to talk to you about. I don't want B Wing to be xxxxxxxx..."
Haha, yea. The T-Rex thing has been going for quite a long while already. Today's incident was like the highest it could ever get. I hope nothing of such magnitude happens again.
Then, we managed to close shop at 3pm today. Went directly to Mt Alvernia Hospital to visit my mum. When I saw her, I was glad that she looked alright. But her left eye was partially bloodshot. Like semi coloured red. It was quite horrifying and I was then told that it suddenly appeared in the afternoon after waking up from the surgery. The eye specialist came by and explained that it was due to the bursting of one of the narrow blood vessels near her left eye. I think it was the chemotherapy medicine that had caused her to get internal bleeding easily. Hope that it clears off after a week, like what the doctor said.
My whole family eventually arrived, with the exception of my brother who is still in Thailand, coming home in a few hours! Left at 9pm with YongQuan, Kiat Loo and Marlene. My eyes were droopy in the car, yet I can't fall asleep at all :/ Looks like my body clock is going haywire again. Gotta sleep at regular hours now cos work has started! Not many offs and leaves left :/ Not sure if the trip to Langkawi is still on or not.
Oh well, looking forward to Friday's dinner! Hope Mummy gets well soon too (:
And in camp, it was a normal day at work except for the fact that I was with the T-rex alone as the rest went to do their YOG stuff. I wasn't needed because I was special (as what Joshua had mentioned because I am untouchable). Haha, but the worst thing was when I got owned by the T-rex after the rest came back. It went like this:
Me talking to Nigel: Nigel, I think you do a better job than T-Rex, why not you switch vocation with him?
T-Rex comes from the back: What!?
Me: Oh, I was saying that Nigel is better than you, and he should replace you as the storeman.
T-Rex: Huh ok lor. If like that, then never mind. I can be your understudy! :D Do clerk job with you. Everyday can free fuck (and he does the hands in the air, hips rocking away motion)
So I got stunned by his words as he went crazy after saying those. Joshua, Christopher and T-Rex were high-fiving as it got super funny for them. And the next thing was:
T-Rex: You know now hungry ghost festival right? I am a ghost, so I can see you changing, bathing and ...
I got stunned again -.- Wah lao, the guys got even louder because it was so crazy. I laughed along with them, but then got quite disgusted with T-Rex. Seriously man, he should stop being so gay. I don't even know if he is straight or not. I hope he is -.- He even asked me to go drinking with him once I ORD. Who will wanna do that!? Definitely not me!
Yea, so this incident just kept all the guys chattering away today, leaving me in the spotlight. Yea, it was quite funny, but I just hope that T-Rex can stop all his 'gay roaring'. It just gives the other guys a wrong idea ar. What if my boss finds out and misunderstands? I can imagine him calling, "Sebastian! Can you come to my office? I got something to talk to you about. I don't want B Wing to be xxxxxxxx..."
Haha, yea. The T-Rex thing has been going for quite a long while already. Today's incident was like the highest it could ever get. I hope nothing of such magnitude happens again.
Then, we managed to close shop at 3pm today. Went directly to Mt Alvernia Hospital to visit my mum. When I saw her, I was glad that she looked alright. But her left eye was partially bloodshot. Like semi coloured red. It was quite horrifying and I was then told that it suddenly appeared in the afternoon after waking up from the surgery. The eye specialist came by and explained that it was due to the bursting of one of the narrow blood vessels near her left eye. I think it was the chemotherapy medicine that had caused her to get internal bleeding easily. Hope that it clears off after a week, like what the doctor said.
My whole family eventually arrived, with the exception of my brother who is still in Thailand, coming home in a few hours! Left at 9pm with YongQuan, Kiat Loo and Marlene. My eyes were droopy in the car, yet I can't fall asleep at all :/ Looks like my body clock is going haywire again. Gotta sleep at regular hours now cos work has started! Not many offs and leaves left :/ Not sure if the trip to Langkawi is still on or not.
Oh well, looking forward to Friday's dinner! Hope Mummy gets well soon too (:
Time Stopped at That Moment
At least I'm glad that I was forgiven and not detested. It's important to me, because whatever happened was not meant to be. We were just throwing angry words towards each other without really thinking of the consequences.
I hope that the time we have now will help us mature and grow, and see things with different light. That moment in the lift was important to me. I wanted it to last longer and not let go but I can't. I have to respect her decision, her actions and her own life. I will make use of this time to come back stronger and more ready for things to come.
I'm going to start to fill my schedule with things enriching and fun. I have to priortise my options now. We'll see how it goes from today onwards. At least I'm blogging regularly. Kind of making a progress report, which is important when you look back at your life.
I hope that the time we have now will help us mature and grow, and see things with different light. That moment in the lift was important to me. I wanted it to last longer and not let go but I can't. I have to respect her decision, her actions and her own life. I will make use of this time to come back stronger and more ready for things to come.
I'm going to start to fill my schedule with things enriching and fun. I have to priortise my options now. We'll see how it goes from today onwards. At least I'm blogging regularly. Kind of making a progress report, which is important when you look back at your life.
Really?
I don't know... I guess I was expecting more because I thought we were the same. But I guess the different circumstances we were in contributed to the gap. I tried, at least. Maybe I am the one who is not ready, not being able to move on when she already can.
I'm really not sure what would have happened if I talked to her a few days ago. She said she could have broken down... Why? She said she didnt really feel anything. So will she have felt something? Or is she just putting up a strong front so that we won't need to go through the angst we went through in the past?
This is confusing. But the fact that I keep thinking about it means that I am not over it. But she has her own life now, I think its better that I do not disturb her. Maybe I will meet her for the last time tomorrow at Udders.
Friends from now on? Or maybe its even impossible? I don't know where this will lead to. I will just take one step at a time.
Sucks to be me :/
I'm really not sure what would have happened if I talked to her a few days ago. She said she could have broken down... Why? She said she didnt really feel anything. So will she have felt something? Or is she just putting up a strong front so that we won't need to go through the angst we went through in the past?
This is confusing. But the fact that I keep thinking about it means that I am not over it. But she has her own life now, I think its better that I do not disturb her. Maybe I will meet her for the last time tomorrow at Udders.
Friends from now on? Or maybe its even impossible? I don't know where this will lead to. I will just take one step at a time.
Sucks to be me :/
Day before a break
Woah, today sure is busy day. Had the SUTD Photo and Video Shoot. Arrived when Edward was already halfway into his video shoot. I was laughing away with Sharolyn from SUTD because Edward was just so funny. But then, I thought he looked cool and he fared pretty well with his face. Edward say he looked and sounded fake. Hmm, I do not think so at all. His content about sports linked to engineering was pretty good and unique.
After him, it was my turn. I did'nt really know what to do, just followed the words on the screen and keep repeating and repeating the whole chunk of words. I thought it was quite fun, it was somewhat like acting you know. I had to kept playing with the ball bearings and metal pieces, at different angles and distances. I even had a one-take, lol. But I actually fumbled up some of the words during some of the takes, but they still took it haha. I hoped they realised that I spoke the wrong stuff lol. It was definitely a new experience taking a photo and video shoot. My first time in a studio and my first time having so many photos taken of me.
After that, went back home to take a nap till 5. Woah, I was just so worn out because of the previous day. Had supper with Edward, Joe, JT, Jia Xin and Kelly. Only slept at 2am. Had to wake up early for the photo and video shoot. Even woke up with a headache but its alright now (:
Went for a birthday dinner for Dennis after that at Olio Cafe at Marine Square. The food was not bad, but the serving was too small! Haha, had to steal some of the fries and ate Joe's leftover Beef Burger. I don't know why I was so hungry lol. Dennis got a Pull and Bear Tshirt for his birthday present and a slice of Chocolate Mousse for the celebration. Time flies, and we are all 20 now. We are going to Sunset Grill for the next birthday celebration to take on the Level 30 Buffalo Wings with the Birthday Boy/Girl.
Can't wait for tomorrow's Genting trip man. Gotta go fetch the peeps now (:
After him, it was my turn. I did'nt really know what to do, just followed the words on the screen and keep repeating and repeating the whole chunk of words. I thought it was quite fun, it was somewhat like acting you know. I had to kept playing with the ball bearings and metal pieces, at different angles and distances. I even had a one-take, lol. But I actually fumbled up some of the words during some of the takes, but they still took it haha. I hoped they realised that I spoke the wrong stuff lol. It was definitely a new experience taking a photo and video shoot. My first time in a studio and my first time having so many photos taken of me.
After that, went back home to take a nap till 5. Woah, I was just so worn out because of the previous day. Had supper with Edward, Joe, JT, Jia Xin and Kelly. Only slept at 2am. Had to wake up early for the photo and video shoot. Even woke up with a headache but its alright now (:
Went for a birthday dinner for Dennis after that at Olio Cafe at Marine Square. The food was not bad, but the serving was too small! Haha, had to steal some of the fries and ate Joe's leftover Beef Burger. I don't know why I was so hungry lol. Dennis got a Pull and Bear Tshirt for his birthday present and a slice of Chocolate Mousse for the celebration. Time flies, and we are all 20 now. We are going to Sunset Grill for the next birthday celebration to take on the Level 30 Buffalo Wings with the Birthday Boy/Girl.
Can't wait for tomorrow's Genting trip man. Gotta go fetch the peeps now (:
Festival of Praise - PRAISE GOD!
What a fulfilling night. Festival of Praise 2010 was great with Planet Shakers and Don Moen. The best part was the sermon by Pastor Che Ahn. It was really heartfelt and I could feel all my emotions bursting out. What a great day planned by God indeed. I wanted to burst out crying, with all the guilt for sins committed, contained inside. It was difficult suppressing them, but I asked God to help me and He did. I couldn't really sing after the sermon at all because I was afraid that my tears would start falling after that. I think it was the best sermon I have ever ever heard of.
And that led me to reflect on what I had done, especially to her. Will she forgive me? I will forgive her. But that doesn't mean that we have to be together. I just want to say that I have loved her so much, but am sorry that I gave up at the last hurdle. Love never quits, I forgot. Love does not consider self before others. I was selfish, and all I hope is that she can forgive me. I had caused the walls we built up to crumble, by myself.
Now, I will focus on my love to Jesus and God.
"Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."
We will have to eradicate the wrongs, so that what is left on earth is of heaven. That is what God has wanted us to do after all. It's a new addition to my standing values and principles. I will need to look and reflect on myself again.
I hope I can start a renewed and refreshed life from now on.
And that led me to reflect on what I had done, especially to her. Will she forgive me? I will forgive her. But that doesn't mean that we have to be together. I just want to say that I have loved her so much, but am sorry that I gave up at the last hurdle. Love never quits, I forgot. Love does not consider self before others. I was selfish, and all I hope is that she can forgive me. I had caused the walls we built up to crumble, by myself.
Now, I will focus on my love to Jesus and God.
"Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."
We will have to eradicate the wrongs, so that what is left on earth is of heaven. That is what God has wanted us to do after all. It's a new addition to my standing values and principles. I will need to look and reflect on myself again.
I hope I can start a renewed and refreshed life from now on.
a broken life, but fixed up to a different shape
Finally after 2 months, I am here blogging again. It's lull so I have all the time in the world to blog and do anything with my computer. Actually I have been sitting in front of my desktop, doing useless stuff like watching videos on Youtube and exploring Facebook. Seriously, the Internet has become a deep abyss that really absorbs humans into it. Anyone who can climb out of that is considered non-human, I think..
Well, there have been many ups and downs since 2 months ago. The most oblivious one would be of course, my separation from someone who has been part of my life for 3 years and 2 months. 'Why? What happen?" people will ask me. Thinking back, I am really not sure how to put them in words. A lot of them are in the emotional language, and it is hard to express them in clear words that can describe the whole situation. What I can say is that I am the one who initiated it, and I could not take it anymore. But still, I guess I would be the one who feel more guilty and more regretful of what I had done. It could have been avoided, tolerated, but I still put an end to it. Whether it was a leap of faith or an act of stupidity, only time can tell.
And so that is why I am burying myself in work and meetings with friends. Well, that seems to work, until the recent lull period which I am currently enjoying now. I realised that it is so difficult to try to remove memories of someone you know so well. No matter where I go, or what I do, I am always reminded of her presence, her companionship and her touch. Not trying to be emo here, but that is what I feel. And she keeps appearing in my dreams. Now she is part of my subconsious huh -.-
Well, I shall stop talking about what has happened between me and her. I got to stop thinking and look forward. Time will help me pull through this, no matter what happens then.
Inception was darn good with Jonathan Heng, Dennis and Cher Han. It really is mind-boggling. The way they craft the whole movie was excellent too. Whoever understands and grasps the content of the movie will definitely be left with many questions when they exit the theater. The top was wobbling at the end right?
The idea of inception is complicated yet familiar since all of us have dreams. We cannot control what we want to dream and logic hoes haywire in them. Sometimes you feel blissful in them, or they can be nightmares for you. But it occurred to me that I have controlled my dreams before. For example, when I was in Primary School, I could sense whether I was in a dream or not. I called it my own willpower of some sort, such that I can really feel if I was in a dream or not. And when I know that I am in a dream, I can stop dreaming and wake up almost immediately. Quite cool huh, maybe this is some kind of special power. And another example is that I can have a continuation of the previous dream I had after waking up by going to sleep again. I tried, and it only worked a few times. But this shows that a certain part of my subconsciousness can be controlled, aye?
SUTD is asking Edward and I to help in this recent advertising/marketing campaign for them. Looks fun and we decided to go. We went down last Thursday for a briefing and to show them the clothes that we will be wearing. It was quite funny because we realised that we had nicknames and they called us himbos -.- Were we really that bimbotic? But they were a good bunch of people, and we talked and laughed at each other. Looking forward to Saturday's Photo and Video Shoot. Still not sure on what to talk about, but just going to try impromptu then. It's more candid and to a certain extend, heartfelt?
Damn, lull is going to be over! Today is the last day of the lull block leave. Man, I want more off days! But Thursday and Friday are going to be slack days, and I'm going to Genting from Sunday to Tuesday! Going to take this break and it's back to work again. Going to wait for the next batch of cadets to come in, but that will be in October already. And from there, it's ORD mode! Yay~
At least I did something useful during the break - sorting out my feelings, working out and going out with friends. Guess this break was kind of efficient for me, haha. I am going to work out more, since I'm so skinny and weak-looking. Going to hit the gyms during work :D
Alright then, I think i should stop. There is just too much to talk about after not blogging for 2 months! Let's hope that life is smooth going for now.
Well, there have been many ups and downs since 2 months ago. The most oblivious one would be of course, my separation from someone who has been part of my life for 3 years and 2 months. 'Why? What happen?" people will ask me. Thinking back, I am really not sure how to put them in words. A lot of them are in the emotional language, and it is hard to express them in clear words that can describe the whole situation. What I can say is that I am the one who initiated it, and I could not take it anymore. But still, I guess I would be the one who feel more guilty and more regretful of what I had done. It could have been avoided, tolerated, but I still put an end to it. Whether it was a leap of faith or an act of stupidity, only time can tell.
And so that is why I am burying myself in work and meetings with friends. Well, that seems to work, until the recent lull period which I am currently enjoying now. I realised that it is so difficult to try to remove memories of someone you know so well. No matter where I go, or what I do, I am always reminded of her presence, her companionship and her touch. Not trying to be emo here, but that is what I feel. And she keeps appearing in my dreams. Now she is part of my subconsious huh -.-
Well, I shall stop talking about what has happened between me and her. I got to stop thinking and look forward. Time will help me pull through this, no matter what happens then.
Inception was darn good with Jonathan Heng, Dennis and Cher Han. It really is mind-boggling. The way they craft the whole movie was excellent too. Whoever understands and grasps the content of the movie will definitely be left with many questions when they exit the theater. The top was wobbling at the end right?
The idea of inception is complicated yet familiar since all of us have dreams. We cannot control what we want to dream and logic hoes haywire in them. Sometimes you feel blissful in them, or they can be nightmares for you. But it occurred to me that I have controlled my dreams before. For example, when I was in Primary School, I could sense whether I was in a dream or not. I called it my own willpower of some sort, such that I can really feel if I was in a dream or not. And when I know that I am in a dream, I can stop dreaming and wake up almost immediately. Quite cool huh, maybe this is some kind of special power. And another example is that I can have a continuation of the previous dream I had after waking up by going to sleep again. I tried, and it only worked a few times. But this shows that a certain part of my subconsciousness can be controlled, aye?
SUTD is asking Edward and I to help in this recent advertising/marketing campaign for them. Looks fun and we decided to go. We went down last Thursday for a briefing and to show them the clothes that we will be wearing. It was quite funny because we realised that we had nicknames and they called us himbos -.- Were we really that bimbotic? But they were a good bunch of people, and we talked and laughed at each other. Looking forward to Saturday's Photo and Video Shoot. Still not sure on what to talk about, but just going to try impromptu then. It's more candid and to a certain extend, heartfelt?
Damn, lull is going to be over! Today is the last day of the lull block leave. Man, I want more off days! But Thursday and Friday are going to be slack days, and I'm going to Genting from Sunday to Tuesday! Going to take this break and it's back to work again. Going to wait for the next batch of cadets to come in, but that will be in October already. And from there, it's ORD mode! Yay~
At least I did something useful during the break - sorting out my feelings, working out and going out with friends. Guess this break was kind of efficient for me, haha. I am going to work out more, since I'm so skinny and weak-looking. Going to hit the gyms during work :D
Alright then, I think i should stop. There is just too much to talk about after not blogging for 2 months! Let's hope that life is smooth going for now.
Goodbye
It's a shame, that it had to be this way
It's not enough to say I'm sorry,
It's not enough to say I'm sorry.
Maybe I'm to blame,
Or maybe we're the same
But either way I can't breathe
Either way I can't breathe
All I had to say was goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive
'Cause everything we've been through
And everything about you seems to be a lie,
A guiltless, twisted lie
That made me learn to hate you
Or hate myself for letting it pass by.
All I had to say is goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
All I had to say is goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
And every, everything isn't only what it seems
So hold these words that you never told me
It's time to say goodbye, it's time to say goodbye...
Goodbye.
Take my pain away
Tell me I, tell me I was wrong
Tell me I was wrong...
It's not enough to say I'm sorry,
It's not enough to say I'm sorry.
Maybe I'm to blame,
Or maybe we're the same
But either way I can't breathe
Either way I can't breathe
All I had to say was goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive
'Cause everything we've been through
And everything about you seems to be a lie,
A guiltless, twisted lie
That made me learn to hate you
Or hate myself for letting it pass by.
All I had to say is goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
All I had to say is goodbye,
We're better off this way,
We're better off this way.
And every, everything isn't only what it seems
So hold these words that you never told me
It's time to say goodbye, it's time to say goodbye...
Goodbye.
Take my pain away
Tell me I, tell me I was wrong
Tell me I was wrong...
Pissed off
I am moving out for Phuket in 32 hours, and yet I feel a sense of foreboding that something bad is going to happen. She is avoiding me somehow, and I'm not sure why. Calling me an airhead? Haha, that I can take it, but then she is missing out in every small detail. It is as if the mutual understanding between us has been lost somewhere during her crazy period of examinations. I tried to be understanding but I just cannot shake off the feeling that something is wrong in the midst of what is happening now.
Nope, we aren't even quarreling right now. But i sense a communication gap between us. Maybe something is going to happen after the trip? I was planning to talk it out, but there was no chance to. I have been sleeping earlier these days because my body clock had been adjusted due to my work commitments for the past few weeks.
I hope all my plans are not going to get screwed up just because of her actions. She is not going to stay over and I am afraid that things might happen because of miscommunication. I don't want anything to screw up, argh. I just dont like it.
Maybe I am just fretting too much over the issue. Maybe things are not what I had expected. Maybe I am just selfish.
I just feel pissed off. period.
Nope, we aren't even quarreling right now. But i sense a communication gap between us. Maybe something is going to happen after the trip? I was planning to talk it out, but there was no chance to. I have been sleeping earlier these days because my body clock had been adjusted due to my work commitments for the past few weeks.
I hope all my plans are not going to get screwed up just because of her actions. She is not going to stay over and I am afraid that things might happen because of miscommunication. I don't want anything to screw up, argh. I just dont like it.
Maybe I am just fretting too much over the issue. Maybe things are not what I had expected. Maybe I am just selfish.
I just feel pissed off. period.
PASS!
Oh My God! I am just so happy that I can dance around like a retarded drunkard right now. I finally passed my Traffic Police Driving Test with only 16 demerit points!
After 1.5 months of lessons and 3 months of waiting, I finally am able to get my driver's license. Woo~ I was the only person in my family that did not know how to drive. Finally, I held the last missing puzzle piece - my whole family can drive now.
It was a tough time when I had to take out time out of my work and personal schedule for the driving lessons. I was thinking, if others can do it, why can't I? In the end, I managed to pass on my first attempt. If not, I had to pay more at around $300. I think the total costs amount up to below $2000, which I am quite proud of. I'm glad that I was able to complete everything by 15 lessons (which is very very little btw) before enrolling for the practical test.
16 Demerit Points were what I got for the test. I remember the tester saying "Wa, Ni Hen Heng ar (Wa, you are very lucky). I guess luck played a big part for my test. If I ever hit the kerb in the circuit, I think I would have failed the test terribly. That would be 10 points if I stroked the kerb. Oh well, it doesn't matter now.
What matters is that I HAVE PASSED! :D
After 1.5 months of lessons and 3 months of waiting, I finally am able to get my driver's license. Woo~ I was the only person in my family that did not know how to drive. Finally, I held the last missing puzzle piece - my whole family can drive now.
It was a tough time when I had to take out time out of my work and personal schedule for the driving lessons. I was thinking, if others can do it, why can't I? In the end, I managed to pass on my first attempt. If not, I had to pay more at around $300. I think the total costs amount up to below $2000, which I am quite proud of. I'm glad that I was able to complete everything by 15 lessons (which is very very little btw) before enrolling for the practical test.
16 Demerit Points were what I got for the test. I remember the tester saying "Wa, Ni Hen Heng ar (Wa, you are very lucky). I guess luck played a big part for my test. If I ever hit the kerb in the circuit, I think I would have failed the test terribly. That would be 10 points if I stroked the kerb. Oh well, it doesn't matter now.
What matters is that I HAVE PASSED! :D
First Driving Lesson Since January
Woah, finally... My Driving Test is approaching on the 23rd March. I have been waiting for this day man haha. I just hope that I can pass the test and start driving where I want to! But of course there will be another problem after that - the availability of a car to drive.
I had my first driving lesson since January and it has really been a long time since I have driven the car. Surprisingly, I handled the 4-wheeler quite well today (: My bad habits were still present though. I keep forgetting to check the blind spot. Luckily I got a very friendly and talkative instructor that made me feel comfortable within the car. I was able to feel confident about my skills and voila, I didn't fare that badly at all. I even managed to alight at the bus stop near my house, and not go back to the driving centre. Haha, it was the first time I could do this because the school had just moved to Woodlands which is very near my house. I think I will just keep doing that till i pass the test (:
Just hope that Kai Xin can feel better and cruise through this period. She won't be 'crusing' definitely, but i hope that she can make it in one piece. University has her struggling in her academics. It really hurts to see her like that. I cannot do much, but only stand by her side.
Tomorrow I am going to have my bone scan done on my left ankle. I just have a feeling that the cracks are still there, and hasn't healed yet. It has already been 6 months since I started on Glucosamine. Just hope everything goes well tomorrow (:
I had my first driving lesson since January and it has really been a long time since I have driven the car. Surprisingly, I handled the 4-wheeler quite well today (: My bad habits were still present though. I keep forgetting to check the blind spot. Luckily I got a very friendly and talkative instructor that made me feel comfortable within the car. I was able to feel confident about my skills and voila, I didn't fare that badly at all. I even managed to alight at the bus stop near my house, and not go back to the driving centre. Haha, it was the first time I could do this because the school had just moved to Woodlands which is very near my house. I think I will just keep doing that till i pass the test (:
Just hope that Kai Xin can feel better and cruise through this period. She won't be 'crusing' definitely, but i hope that she can make it in one piece. University has her struggling in her academics. It really hurts to see her like that. I cannot do much, but only stand by her side.
Tomorrow I am going to have my bone scan done on my left ankle. I just have a feeling that the cracks are still there, and hasn't healed yet. It has already been 6 months since I started on Glucosamine. Just hope everything goes well tomorrow (:
Life is full of obstacles. They are there for people to break them down.
Ah, like what Randy Paush has mentioned in his Last Lecture - 'Brick Walls are there to stop the people who don't want it badly enough.' Life indeed till now has been full of obstacles for me.
Handling the injury of the stress fracture in my left ankle isn't easy at all. Imagine walking and you feel that you need to make a conscious effort to make sure that you are walking straight, or look normal when walking. It aches every morning and night. I think I have rheumatism already...
And now the problem about choosing universities. I really want to succeed in life. Succeed - as in I want a rich life, not in the materialistic aspect but an adventurous life that will be both purposeful and fun. Which university and course to enroll in so that I can ensure that?
I have already a few top choices here:
NTU: Accountancy
NUS: Industrial and Systems Engineering
SMU: Accountancy
SUTD: Engineering Systems and Design
I believe that getting a professional degree will be better than getting a general one. The set of skills you obtain in Accountancy or Engineering will be essential, I think, in the future. That is why I am thinking of applying overseas too, to Imperial College for their Engineering Course. But the only Engineering course i can apply to is their Chemical Engineering, because I didn't take up Physics in JC. If only I did that... But oh well, what's over is over. I have to focus on what I have now.
It is really frustrating to choose a university that will suit you, because you will never know until you are enrolled into those universities. I don't think I can believe what others say about the life there, because ultimately I am so different from them. So will it be luck that determines where I am going to go? I don't want to miss out any opportunities, so I am just going to give my best for the applications to all these universities.
And SUTD finally released more information about their Curriculum System and Admission matters. Oh boy, they really demand differently from the other universities. Design? I'm interested in them, but I am not too sure if I have any outstanding work that I can display to them. But I am just going to try anyway. Collaboration with MIT is no joke... That's like saying you are going to work with the world's greatest geniuses. Imagine the career opportunities and prospects after graduating from there! But I will be part of the pioneer batch if I were to apply for it. Though it is still not so recognized in the region, I think it'll be quite fun to be part of the pioneers in SUTD too. Haha.
Will everything be okay? It definitely won't be. I just have to hold on myself and tell myself to believe that I can pass all these trials - my busy schedule for these few weeks. A sneak peek into this week:
17th - NTU Accountancy Interview
18th - Driving Lesson
19th - Bone Scan, Driving Lesson
20th - SUTD Briefing + Commissioning Parade
21st - Floorball Match versus Merahan Gunners
And the driving test on 23rd! Just hope that I can really refresh all my driving skills in the upcoming lessons. Oh well, I should start preparing for tomorrow's work and tuition.
Good luck to myself :/
Handling the injury of the stress fracture in my left ankle isn't easy at all. Imagine walking and you feel that you need to make a conscious effort to make sure that you are walking straight, or look normal when walking. It aches every morning and night. I think I have rheumatism already...
And now the problem about choosing universities. I really want to succeed in life. Succeed - as in I want a rich life, not in the materialistic aspect but an adventurous life that will be both purposeful and fun. Which university and course to enroll in so that I can ensure that?
I have already a few top choices here:
NTU: Accountancy
NUS: Industrial and Systems Engineering
SMU: Accountancy
SUTD: Engineering Systems and Design
I believe that getting a professional degree will be better than getting a general one. The set of skills you obtain in Accountancy or Engineering will be essential, I think, in the future. That is why I am thinking of applying overseas too, to Imperial College for their Engineering Course. But the only Engineering course i can apply to is their Chemical Engineering, because I didn't take up Physics in JC. If only I did that... But oh well, what's over is over. I have to focus on what I have now.
It is really frustrating to choose a university that will suit you, because you will never know until you are enrolled into those universities. I don't think I can believe what others say about the life there, because ultimately I am so different from them. So will it be luck that determines where I am going to go? I don't want to miss out any opportunities, so I am just going to give my best for the applications to all these universities.
And SUTD finally released more information about their Curriculum System and Admission matters. Oh boy, they really demand differently from the other universities. Design? I'm interested in them, but I am not too sure if I have any outstanding work that I can display to them. But I am just going to try anyway. Collaboration with MIT is no joke... That's like saying you are going to work with the world's greatest geniuses. Imagine the career opportunities and prospects after graduating from there! But I will be part of the pioneer batch if I were to apply for it. Though it is still not so recognized in the region, I think it'll be quite fun to be part of the pioneers in SUTD too. Haha.
Will everything be okay? It definitely won't be. I just have to hold on myself and tell myself to believe that I can pass all these trials - my busy schedule for these few weeks. A sneak peek into this week:
17th - NTU Accountancy Interview
18th - Driving Lesson
19th - Bone Scan, Driving Lesson
20th - SUTD Briefing + Commissioning Parade
21st - Floorball Match versus Merahan Gunners
And the driving test on 23rd! Just hope that I can really refresh all my driving skills in the upcoming lessons. Oh well, I should start preparing for tomorrow's work and tuition.
Good luck to myself :/
Bad Performance, but still a Win.
Man, today's match was disastrous. Everyone was playing really bad, but in the end we still managed to win. Well first to start, we didn't have a lot of our players that turned up for the first period of the match. The twins, Soffian and Desmond. 2 defenders and 2 of our best attackers not around for the first period wasn't really good news for our already very small team.
So the first period began and we conceded the first goal within the first 5 minutes. It was definitely a devastating blow to our morale because all the time for the last few matches, we had almost always scored the first goal of the match. We realised that this game was not going to be easy. We managed to snatch back 2 goals in the first period, but only to concede another goal before the end of the first period.
During the 2nd period, Desmond, Soffian and the twins arrived. Although they were late, I still want to say that we were lucky that they still came even though they were cooped up at the open house in NTU. If they did not, I wonder how we were going to win the game.
The game ended with a score of 6-5, with us winning. It was a bad day for all of us as we knew that we were not performing up to our usual standard. Well, I guess that all teams have such bad times, like what Liverpool is having now.
I want to contribute more to the team by scoring goals and giving assists. But with my current injured self, I am afraid that my contribution will just end before the season ends. I have to take good care of my ankle because the pain is worsening after physio. I think I will have to stop the physio exercise soon. It wasn't even aching before physio.
Hope that we emerge as runner-ups at least for the season (:
So the first period began and we conceded the first goal within the first 5 minutes. It was definitely a devastating blow to our morale because all the time for the last few matches, we had almost always scored the first goal of the match. We realised that this game was not going to be easy. We managed to snatch back 2 goals in the first period, but only to concede another goal before the end of the first period.
During the 2nd period, Desmond, Soffian and the twins arrived. Although they were late, I still want to say that we were lucky that they still came even though they were cooped up at the open house in NTU. If they did not, I wonder how we were going to win the game.
The game ended with a score of 6-5, with us winning. It was a bad day for all of us as we knew that we were not performing up to our usual standard. Well, I guess that all teams have such bad times, like what Liverpool is having now.
I want to contribute more to the team by scoring goals and giving assists. But with my current injured self, I am afraid that my contribution will just end before the season ends. I have to take good care of my ankle because the pain is worsening after physio. I think I will have to stop the physio exercise soon. It wasn't even aching before physio.
Hope that we emerge as runner-ups at least for the season (:
Tired
Argh.. I'm tired, I do not know why. I just feel light headed and can't really focus on things. I think there is something wrong with my sleeping and resting cycle at night. I have to get it back to normal.
With all my night driving lessons and late nights, I think it is taking a toll on my body. Damn, and there are so many things to settle. Driving, SAT, projects and birthdays. Phew...
I hope everything goes smoothly.
With all my night driving lessons and late nights, I think it is taking a toll on my body. Damn, and there are so many things to settle. Driving, SAT, projects and birthdays. Phew...
I hope everything goes smoothly.